iBlog: Day 4 (mailshot)


Tomorrow's blog today

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Day 4 (mailshot)

Okay, MAR-JO-SIVE news!!!

This is even bigger than when Ben Adams changed his name to be more like me!!

In 2001 Ben Adams and me bet a friend called Jane that she couldnl't get pregnant as back then we thought skinny women couldn't get pregnant past a certain point as there wouldn't be room for a baby (or `faetus`) to grow. Anyway, the bet was that if she miscarried she owed us a pie and a pint EACH, but if she won and gave birth to a healthy baby, Ben and me would raise the child as our own.

Anyway, nine months later as Ben Adams was talking to Andy Peters on Top of the Pops with his first number one hit, while at the same time poor Jane was in labour screaming like a PoW and I was stuck in Willesdon Green*!

I didn't know who I let down more. On the one hand, poor Jane had no one to hold her hand and rumour has it skinny people suffer a lot more in child birth, but all Ben Adams had was hundreds of groupies, cocaine and his fame and fortune. They both needed me and I was stuck between a rock and a hard place on the District Line.

So in the end I rang the hospital to pass the message to Jane saying `sorry I couldn't make it but bros before hos` and walked to the top secret BBC TOTP studios to make sure Ben was coping okay.

By the time I got to the BBC poor Ben was no where to be found, apparently he went off on his private jet to Rio DJ Aero or somewhere with Louise Nurding and a bottle of bollinger. So I couldn't help poor old Ben Adams in the end so off I went back to the Oxford Circus Maternity Hospital to check if Jane needed any help. When I got there, apparentlly she had checked out and asked not to be contacted by Ben Adams and me... well just me.

In hindsight, I let two people down that night, lost two friends and my half of a half a baby.

So off I went back to Norfolk and stayed there feeling upset for a long time. Until today.

Jane got in contact with me today explaining that Ben Aams and me have a son called `John Leslie Adams` who is now 7.

Apparently she did tell Ben Adams and he just came up with this.

So now it's serious, we HAVE to put pressure on Ben Adams to get in contact with me so we can raise this child!!!! He owes this child a second chance.


* I had been hoping to go from Liverpool Street, to Oxford Circus (to the Oxford Circus Maternity Hopsital) thence to the BBC stop which is the secret stop on the Central Line and therefore do both friends at the same time, but I'm from Norfolk so I managed to get the wrong line and end up on the South Bank.

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  • At 12:29 AM, Blogger umm said…

    yeah, dude, stopped reading when you thought it would be ok to mention miscarriage in the same post that is supposed to be funny.


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