iBlog: Dear Archie


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Friday, December 26, 2008

Dear Archie

Dear the Arched Bishops of Cantebury

Hello. And God bless to you all. My first name is Benvolio and I am here to speak to you about a subject that is very close to my heart, and the greatest of these is love.

But I haven't come all the way down here to talk to you about the gayness of bishops, or indeed the gayness of straighshops. But I would like ot take this very opportunity to talk to you about the clothing what you all wear. I takes for examples of the hassock and that of the crozier. They seem bulky at best or a danger waiting to hazard at werse!!

What with all that climbing up and subsequently down churches and indeed cathedrals and such the hassock must indeed must get in your literal way and thus be of dangerness to yourselves. Praise God you(plural)'ve not been injured as of thusly far.

I and my wife have therefore devised a right good new uniform!!!!!1 Are indeed you not thrilled?

Let me walk you through this revolution of this epoch's must have ecclesiastical wear... This is a uniform that will see you through to the post-post-modern era.

There is a picture if the new Postmodernisticalistic uniform directly inside of that link there. You can see all it has to literally offer.

That's aboout it really. As you can see, it's safe, no tripping up robes getting up pullpitz, ladders and such, is fully certified to British Standards E8678f g and r. There is also room for coroporate sponsorship on various places on the uniform. (Just so you're aware Bensons for Beds are very interested to begin talks with you).

So, let let me know what you think yeah? I for one am literally confident that this will boost your flagging numbers and make your church friendly and happy.

Our Indonesian factories are beginning making 50,000 units first thing tomorrow ready to be containerised back to the UK for the beginning of Easter. Our factories are relatively ethical and has amongst the fewest nutrition related industrial accidents in Asia Minor.

Yours sincerely
And also with you

Mr Benvolio Haversham-Brown


  • At 9:06 PM, Blogger Timothy V Reeves said…

    Suggested update for version 2.0.1 - a pocket for durex for sticking marriages back together (not for own use)


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