Dear Karla Natasha Smith Cohen
Dear Karla Natasha Smith Cohen (University of Maryland, College Park ; Lecturer ;BSOS-Criminology & Criminal Justice)
Greetings from across the pond that is the Atlantic Ocean. My name is Inspector Benjamin Francois Fosterson. Your name was given to me by Hercule Christie, a remarkable young man.
I do hope you'll forgive this intrusions but I have a murder mystery that only you can solve. You'll excuse my Byronic side stepping of chit-chat-chot and get straight to the knitty and the gritty.
On the 11th of December 2008 a young man called Patricia (it's a British thing) Harrington-Blyghte was walking home past the hedge that he always passed when he went by that spot. What was curious about this time, (which we assume was the FERST time) a man/woman/murder leapt from said bush and knifed to death Mr Pat with a blade of some sort. What was curious as to this particular incident which the police are calling `Stabzilla` was that the `Ty-stab-asaurux Rex` left a tantellising clue at the scene of the incident that police are treating as a crime due to the suspicious circumstances of Mr Pat's death. (Suiside is all but ruled out due to the repeated lunge blows to the Julugar vein).
This clue was in the form of a pine cone. Inside of which was left a bug that has hitherto been seldom seen. About the bug, not much is known save that it is called the `Jewbug` (Often refered to as the `Hayfever Beetle`) and can only be seen in certain places of South Norfolk. It is categorised by yellow `go faster` stripes along its flank and long neck.
After seeing the Silence of the Lambs I realise that bugs mean a lot when dealing with Stab-a-sauri and wondered whether you knew could enlighten me as to the meaning behind the Hayfever Beetle in a pine cone at the scene of the crime.
Any information you have will be literally helpful. My telephone number is 07890 189390 if you wish to discuss this matter further. Failing this, write to me on this adress.
Time is of the essence!
Yours sincerely
Detective Benvolio Francois Fosterson
P.s I do hope you'll excuse me writing from a personal e-mail adress but the Metropolitain Police Computer we all share has been taken away for cleaning this week because DCI Rogers spilt tea on it (the tit!). Next week I can be contacted on crime@met.police.com.uk as usual though.
Greetings from across the pond that is the Atlantic Ocean. My name is Inspector Benjamin Francois Fosterson. Your name was given to me by Hercule Christie, a remarkable young man.
I do hope you'll forgive this intrusions but I have a murder mystery that only you can solve. You'll excuse my Byronic side stepping of chit-chat-chot and get straight to the knitty and the gritty.
On the 11th of December 2008 a young man called Patricia (it's a British thing) Harrington-Blyghte was walking home past the hedge that he always passed when he went by that spot. What was curious about this time, (which we assume was the FERST time) a man/woman/murder leapt from said bush and knifed to death Mr Pat with a blade of some sort. What was curious as to this particular incident which the police are calling `Stabzilla` was that the `Ty-stab-asaurux Rex` left a tantellising clue at the scene of the incident that police are treating as a crime due to the suspicious circumstances of Mr Pat's death. (Suiside is all but ruled out due to the repeated lunge blows to the Julugar vein).
This clue was in the form of a pine cone. Inside of which was left a bug that has hitherto been seldom seen. About the bug, not much is known save that it is called the `Jewbug` (Often refered to as the `Hayfever Beetle`) and can only be seen in certain places of South Norfolk. It is categorised by yellow `go faster` stripes along its flank and long neck.
After seeing the Silence of the Lambs I realise that bugs mean a lot when dealing with Stab-a-sauri and wondered whether you knew could enlighten me as to the meaning behind the Hayfever Beetle in a pine cone at the scene of the crime.
Any information you have will be literally helpful. My telephone number is 07890 189390 if you wish to discuss this matter further. Failing this, write to me on this adress.
Time is of the essence!
Yours sincerely
Detective Benvolio Francois Fosterson
P.s I do hope you'll excuse me writing from a personal e-mail adress but the Metropolitain Police Computer we all share has been taken away for cleaning this week because DCI Rogers spilt tea on it (the tit!). Next week I can be contacted on crime@met.police.com.uk as usual though.
posted by Ben F. Foster Esq. (c) @ 10:51 PM
1 Comments:
At 10:58 PM,
Timothy V Reeves said…
You should have tried 221B baker street before you start outsourcing abroad. Buy British is what I always say.
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